Family Life prayer

Prayers for Hergycub 2.0

Today is a day that I just want to be honest about what is on my heart.  So thank you for giving me that opportunity.

Those of you who regularly follow this blog know that an early ultrasound detected that, just like Janie Lou, Hergycub 2.0 also has kidney issues.  Since that time, we also accidentally found out that we are having a girl.  At the risk of spoiling the surprise when she is born, I want to go ahead and share her name with you, Gracie Jewel.

I am sharing her name with you for one reason alone, so that you can approach the throne of God on her behalf.

The first ultrasound that detected the hydronephrosis (enlarged kidney) showed that the enlargement was mild.  However, a recent ultrasound has revealed that the enlargement has increased and the hydronephrosis in both kidneys has been upgraded from mild to moderate.  Honestly, the days since that diagnosis have been difficult.

Last night Carl and I attended a prayer service at our church and were prayed over by a wise man.  As he prayed for Gracie’s kidneys, he said something that I’ve known almost my whole life, and yet somehow hadn’t thought of in this situation.  He said, “God, you are a dad, and you have a dad’s heart.”  I honestly don’t remember anything else that he said.  That simple phrase breathed hope back into my aching heart.  My sobs quieted, and I was again able to believe that God will heal our child.

Honestly, sometimes it’s hard to believe.  Yes, I pray asking God to heal our child.  I prayed a year ago for God to heal Janie Lou.  And His way of healing her was through surgery.  This has been the most difficult part for me.  Surgery last year was a huge deal, but because Janie Lou never acted sick, had one good kidney, and recovered in a matter of days, it wasn’t as tough on my heart as this situation is.

Knowing that we could go down that road again only with two bad kidneys is very scary for this mama.  Most days I am fine, but in the quiet moments when I can stand before God honestly, I am scared.  I am scared of the worst-case scenario.  I feel bad bringing a sick child into the world.  My hearts desires to be comforted, but my head reminds me of the reality of the situation.

My heart believes that God is more than able to heal Gracie’s kidneys, but my head says, “Yes, He is able, but He may choose not to.”

This is a harsh reality, and I am sharing all of this with you for a couple of reasons.

1.  I want you to know that I am a real person with doubts and fears.

2.  I want you to know that God’s plan is for us to be holy, not happy.

This morning I read Genesis 22.  This is the story of God asking Abraham to sacrifice his one and only son on the altar.  Abraham had waited 100 years for this son, and now God was asking him to sacrifice his child. Whether you’ve read the story a million times, or never even heard of it, YOU MUST READ IT!  Abraham trusts God to the point of binding up his child and laying him on the altar.  After this, he raises his knife in the air and is about to sacrifice his son when an angel of the Lord stops him.  The angel of the Lord says, “Do not stretch out your hand against the lad, and do nothing to him; for now I know that you fear God, since you have not withheld your son, your only son, from Me.”  (v 12)  Immediately, Abraham saw a ram caught in a near by bush and he ends up sacrificing the ram instead of his only son.  Verse 14 says Abraham named that place “The Lord Will Provide.”

God was testing Abraham.  And Abraham proved faithful.  God provided another sacrifice for the altar.  But when God sent His own Son, Jesus to earth to be sacrificed, God didn’t back out at the last second.  He allowed his only son, the son whom He loved, to be sacrificed on a cross so that you and I could have a relationship with Him.  God, as a dad, knows what it is like to see His child suffer.

God’s ultimate desire is not for me to have a healthy baby and live a happy life.  God’s desire is for me to be in relationship with Him, and that requires I be holy.  God often uses trials to make us look more like Him.  The idea that if you follow Jesus your life will be easy breezy is a lie.  Read the Bible, story after story reveals to us, that life here on earth is difficult.  So why follow Jesus if He doesn’t remove all the bumps along the road?

I follow Jesus because in Him we have a hope that will last far beyond this life.  Yes, this life may be difficult, in fact for most of us, this life WILL be difficult.  But clinging to Jesus gives us a hope that we will one day spend eternity with Him in glory.  A place where there are no tears.  A place where cancer doesn’t exist and no one knows the meaning of hydronephrosis.

I believe God is able to heal Gracie, and this mama’s heart is begging you to join us in prayer for God to heal her.  But I trust God and His plan.  (Or at the very least I want to trust God and His plan, and most days I do.)  Last night, I told God that I was laying Gracie at His feet.  She is His child more than mine.  I pray that His Daddy heart has compassion on her and heals her kidneys.  But I also pray that He uses her life to glorify Himself.  I know this is a risky prayer because He knows how best her life can bring Him glory, and it might not be the easiest route for us, but I know in the end, any hardship we endure as a result of this test will be worth it.

I long to look like Jesus, and this process is definitely refining me and my faith.

I have another ultrasound on Thursday.  Will you join us in praying for Gracie?  Will join us in praying for a miracle?  Every time I lay on that table and they pour that warm gel on my belly I get teary-eyed with hope that the kidneys have shrunk and are healthy.  So far that hasn’t been the case, but I walk in faith knowing He is Jehovah Rapha, the God who heals.

I know each of you has a story and a need for prayer also.  I would love to pray for you as I pray for my own family.  If you would like, you can share your story by leaving a comment here on the blog, or if you feel more comfortable, you can share it with me via email at faith@faithklein.com.

Can I pray for us right now?

Dear God,

Thank you for being here with us in this moment.  Thank you for being Jehovah Rapha, the God who heals.  You know each of our situations and our needs.  You know how each of needs healing physically, spiritually and emotionally.  I pray that you will heal us completely.  We know you are able.  I pray that in the process of healing us, You will make us look more like You.  I want to be holy and to bring you glory.  I pray this for my friends, as well.  Please heal us as you best see fit, in Your perfect timing, according to Your will.

Lord we love you and trust you.  Help us to trust even when it is difficult.

Thank you, Lord,

Amen.

22 comments on “Prayers for Hergycub 2.0

  1. Allison V.

    He is Jehovah Rapha! Praying for Gracie…thanks for sharing.

  2. speakinginfaith

    Thanks, Allison! And thanks for dinner last night! It was delicious!!!!

  3. Faith,

    I had just closed my journal from my time with God this morning and then picked up my computer and saw your blog. Would you believe I was just reading the Abraham and Issac story this morning as well!

    I feel like I’m still trembling inside as I feel what Abraham had to have felt on the side of that mountain. Even as Issac asks – “where’s the lamb.” Oh, I just think Abraham’s human heart would have been breaking. Yet, his faith was so steadfast – yes even to the point of raising the knife over his son. If it were me, I would be shaking and weeping.

    I was journaling through my own life circumstances of waiting and praying for a husband… a precious gift. What if God asked me to give it back in some way?

    And now as I read your story, I’m so, so grateful for your honesty and openness.

    In the sharing of real life pain and struggle, I can see God in you.

    God is the same yesterday and today. Thanks for helping me remember that this morning!

    Holly

  4. Linda Baker

    Dear Faith,
    I’ve been praying for ‘Gracie’ along with you and Carl. I too, would love too see God choose to heal her little body. From your past writings and sharing, I believe that He would receive all the glory and thanks due His mighty name.

    I will continue to pray His perfect plan and will for your lives. May He comfort you with His presence today with the peace that passes understanding. He’s chosen you to make Himself known through every joy and trial that arises…and you are doing just that!

    Linda

    Jeremiah 33:3- ‘Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.’

  5. speakinginfaith

    Thanks for your words and your prayers, Holly! I am encouraged by your faith.

    Hugs!

  6. speakinginfaith

    Thank You, Linda for your God-inspired words.

  7. Leigh Anne Pickup

    Praying for you, Gracie, and your family! Your strength and gift of sharing brings great encouragement!

  8. speakinginfaith

    Thanks Leigh Anne. We appreciate your prayers. Hope your little man is doing well.

  9. We love you Gracie! 🙂 the tears are hard…..but we know God loves us! Love, Daddy

  10. My heart is heavy for you and we will be praying in earnest for your strength and comfort, Gracie’s healing and yes, for God’s will to be done. I appreciate your honesty – I’m sure many can relate to those times when we’re frightened to pray those “handing over control” prayers, because of where they might lead.

    And, I agree – God desires for us to be Holy, in becoming more like Him – and through that relationship, we find happiness. It’s not always the path we (or the world) would imagine us taking. Still, God knows, sees and loves Gracie and all of you. He hears your cries and the Spirit intercedes for you, even when you have no words.

    Much love to you all.

  11. speakinginfaith

    Thank you, Mela. I am so comforted knowing that even when I don’t have the words to say, God hears my heart.

  12. speakinginfaith

    Carl,

    Can’t wait to meet our little girl 🙂 You are such a great Daddy…there is no one else in the world I would rather walk through these waters with than you. Love you!

  13. Beth Janssen

    Your little Gracie has been in my prayers since I first read about her kidney issues. I have never met you, but I know her Daddy from the KT cruises. My heart hurts for you all. I am an ovarian cancer survivor, so I know how how hard it is to hand over the situation to God – I struggle with that every day, but I know God is good.

    Sending love and best wishes to you and your family.

  14. My good friend Rebekah Keiser sent me your link, as I am going through a very similar situation with my first baby. My heart breaks for you and your family as you go through this, and I know how scary it can be. We found out a few months ago that our baby’s kidneys failed, and he will most likely not live after he is born. Despite the many suggestions to terminate the pregnancy, we chose to carry him full term because we too, believe God is Healer! I am due in February, and each day brings me closer to meeting my child and possibly saying goodbye at the same time. As I read your blog my heart jumped when you wrote about Abraham and Isaac, because that is the very same story my husband and I have been holding onto throughout all of this! I can’t explain why, but I got so excited to see that the very same story in the Bible has been spoken to you and that you shared it. I think it is so beautiful how Abraham feared God enough to lay his son at the feet of God, and that is what we do every day with our baby. It sounds like you and your family are doing the same thing with Gracie, and I am so blessed to read about how much you are trusting God with your child’s life and how your prayer is to allow God to be glorified through your struggle. I have learned to take on the same perspective, and my prayer has been to let go so God can be glorified and work in all of this. One thing I struggled with at first was how much to hope for a miracle and how much to prepare for what could happen. Then my sister said something that changed my perspective and my prayers so much: Our hope should be in God Himself, not in what He can do. I have held onto that every day as we walk through this. I pray you will also find your hope in Christ each moment, for we know that He does not disappoint. I continue to tell myself that as my son’s mother, I have to let God do His work and use my child’s life for something great, or I am robbing my child of what his life could be. As I read your blog I just kept coming across things that were so similar to my thoughts, my emotions, my prayers, and my fears. But I am so encouraged to read how God is holding you and your faith and trust is in Him. Our precious baby’s are in His hands, and He loves them more than we ever could, as hard as that is to imagine some days. We named our boy Joshua, for “Jehova saves.” We believe God can heal him, as He can heal Gracie. Yet we are much like you, in that we know He may choose not to heal for a greater plan than we can see. We are thinking of choosing Isaac for his middle name, because of the story of Abraham. I am so sorry you are going through this, but I am comforted by your words as another mother who is clinging to her Savior as her baby’s life is in His hands alone. I will be praying for Gracie and for your family! I pray God does heal your baby, and ours, but we know He is sovereign and He loves us. Thank you for sharing your heart and your faith on your blog! I pray God fills you with His peace that is beyond our understanding each day!
    In His Love,
    Cory Benson

  15. speakinginfaith

    Thank you, Beth. We appreciate your prayers.

  16. speakinginfaith

    Cory,

    Thank you for sharing your story. I am so sorry to hear about Joshua. Please know that I will be praying for you and your husband and your baby boy. Joshua was the name we had picked out if we would have been having a boy. I think God is definitely connecting our hearts. When is your due date? We are due on Valentine’s Day.

    Please, please keep me posted. I am so encouraged by your post, and yet my heart breaks for you at the same time. I loved what you said your sister shared with you about putting our hope God for who He is rather than what He does. Thanks for sharing that perspective and truth.

    I am praying for you. Please stay in touch. My email is faith@faithklein.com. I am looking forward to hearing about how God glorifies Himself through Joshua’s life. He is already being glorified because of your faith. I am praying for you and will be lifting you up even when you can’t pray.

    Sending you hugs and prayers from Nashville. Please tell Rebekah ‘hi’ for me.

  17. Well Faith this is the first blog post of anybody’s I’ve ever read but it got passed to me by my sister. 🙂 You know I heard my mom and dad pray those same prayers over me when I had issues with my kidneys. “We will lay her at your feet God and whatever end gives you the most Glory, we will give you Glory” Wow, a mom who is willing to do that is a mom of faith.

    And you are right God doesn’t remove the bumps in our road of life, but he does care deeply about how we navigate them. I will be praying for you.

  18. speakinginfaith

    Thank you, Amy. I have thought about you and your parents often. Knowing how sick you were and how God healed you is a modern day example of how God shows off in our lives as Jehovah-Rapha. I know even as a young child, my own faith was influenced by the faith of your parents. I often think of them when I can’t pray. I remember your mom saying that the body if Christ lifts us up when we don’t have the strength to do it ourselves. I am thankful for friends like you and so many others that are praying on our behalf. Thank you, Amy. Your life is a testament to the power of our God.

  19. Pavlik’s are praying for Gracie and Cory’s baby, Joshua! Thank you for sharing your journey with us so openly. God is glorified in how you’ve touched me tonight. Love you!

  20. speakinginfaith

    Thank you, Dana. I’m encouraged by how you have responded to the past 9 months of your life. God is good. We are praying for your family. Love you!

  21. Pingback: Bible Study notes: Jehovah-rapha The Lord Who Heals | Speaking in Faith Blog

  22. Found your blog through Google search. I want to thank you for writing this this is really ministered to me. I’m 36 weeks pregnant and just found our son has hydronephrosis of 20 mm. I’m believing in God’s will , trusting in Him and putting my faith in him. I’m praying God will heal our boy in utero. Grateful that otherwise he has developed completely healthy according to medical standards. I tear up when I think about it too much, but am trying to trust God. I will choose to rest in Him and trust his hand throughout this process.

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