marriage Wedding Wednesday

WW! Do you have all you need?

Yesterday as I was putting Janie Lou down for her nap, I turned on Carl’s piano CD, At The Piano.  JL has decided that listening to Daddy’s music is the only way she wants to go to sleep during the day. I don’t mind this at all!  {smile} Yesterday I decided to stay in her room and do some writing as she went to sleep.  When she’s in her crib, she can’t see me, so I’m not actually a distraction, and then I get to enjoy Daddy’s music, too.

As I was sitting there, Carl’s instrumental version of Great is Thy Faithfulness came on.  Although, he isn’t singing on the CD, I was singing the words in my head.  As I got to the chorus, I sang to myself:

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

When I got to the line, “All I have needed Thy hand hath provided” I thought, “Do I really believe this? What would my life look like if I did?”

Have you ever thought about this question?

When I moved to Nashville, this was my theme song. My best friend and I had both seen God provide for us in more ways than we could count, so we claimed this as our song.  We would get so excited when we sang it at church or heard it on the radio.  We truly believed that God had provided for all that we needed.

Today for Wedding Wednesdays! I want us to apply this phrase to our relationships – or lack there of.

Do you believe that God has provided for all your needs relationally?

Has God provided for all your needs in your marriage?

Has God provided for all your needs in your singleness?

Has God provided for all your needs in your engagement or dating relationships?

If I’m honest, I must admit that there are days when I want Carl to provide for me what I need to let God provide, and what ONLY God CAN provide.  At times, I want to find my security in Carl’s being there for me.  I want to find my beauty in the way Carl looks at me.  I want to know I’m loved by the way Carl loves me.  I NEED Carl to be the perfect husband, so that I feel better about myself–or at least I think I need that from him.

I had one of these weeks last week.  I was in a funk and really thought that it was Carl’s responsibility to make me feel better.  I believed he could make my insecurities go away.  Then Sunday in church we sang the song, Hosanna, You Are The God Who Saves Us by Paul Baloche.  I had an ah-ha moment when I sang the line, “In Your presence all my fears are washed away, washed away!”  At this moment God reminded me that only He can wash away my fears.  When I’m in a funk, Carl can’t heal my heart.

Only. God. Can. 

It was at this moment that I freed Carl of the responsibility to fix what was going on in my heart.  I had to lay it down at the feet of Jesus.  I had to choose to loosen my grip on my fear so that God’s presence could wash them away.

After that ah-ha moment in church and then hearing Great is Thy Faithfulness, I knew God was working on my heart.  I needed to be reminded of truth.  The truth is that I was wanting a man to do what only God can do.  I wanted a man to fill what only God can fill.  I was reminded of this truth: I already have all I need in Christ.

19 And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

The Holy Bible  : New International Version. electronic ed. Grand Rapids : Zondervan, 1996, c1984, S. Php 4:19

As a single woman for 30 years, I dealt with this in my singleness.  At times I would make poor relationship decisions thinking that if I just had a man in my life, my heart would feel loved.  Then I would date a guy who treated me less than best, and I would end up feeling worse about myself than when I started.  I thought a man could meet my emotional needs.

Only. God. Can.

As a married woman, I often have expectations that Carl can meet all of my needs.  Not only do I believe he can, I am tempted to believe that it is his responsibility as a godly husband, to meet these “needs” for me.

But the truth is, Carl can do all the right things and say all the right things and I will still feel empty if I think he can fill me up.

Sure he can improve upon my day by being sweet, but my identity, significance and purpose must come from God alone if I want to truly be satisfied.

When I can step back and refocus, and let God do what only he can do, then I can enjoy my relationship with Carl more each day.  I have freed him of meeting an unrealistic expectation.

This isn’t as easy as one, two, three, but it is attainable.  First of all, asking God to reveal to you what you see as unmet needs in your relationships.  Then ask Him to help you lay them at His feet.  Ask Him show you how He continually meet those needs.

Make a conscious decision to reassign responsibility of needs to God and not to men.

Please note, this does not excuse men from treating you poorly, but it does help you stop defining yourself by the way you are treated.  And it releases the pressure to be unsatisfied in life based on the way other treat us.  If you are single, it frees you of the thought that life would be better, IF you just had a man.

Reflection Questions:

If you are single, how can knowing God provides for all your needs free your heart?

If you are married, how can you find freedom in this same truth?

What fears are you facing that are really misplaced expectations?

5 comments on “WW! Do you have all you need?

  1. Thank-you once again for your thoughtful and honest insight. Love you.

  2. speakinginfaith

    Thanks Kristin, love you, too!

  3. Linda Baker

    Faith,

    Although I am a couple of years older than you, I gain tremendous insight from your writing!
    I actually have a ‘folder’ on my gmail that I move your blogs to after I read them, for future reference and encouragement.

    This topic has been a biggy for me lately. But every time I place my trust in God, do as His word
    says, He has not failed to diffuse all my insecurities and to make His presence known in whatever situation arises.

    Your blogs are definitely a welcome guest at my morning breakfast table. Thanks for joining me for ‘coffee’!

    God continue to bless you in all you put your hand to for His glory!

    In Christ,
    Linda Baker

  4. speakinginfaith

    Linda,

    Thank you for your kind words. I am always humbled when God speaks through me to offer encouragement to others. I’m glad you found that here. I’m also glad to hear that you are allowing God to continue to work on your heart and your insecurities. It is so easy to let them creep back into our lives after we feel like we have conquered them. I’m thankful that God’s mercies are new every morning and that He continues to meet all my needs.

    God bless you!
    Faith

  5. Pingback: Live your calling, or die trying « Speaking in Faith Blog

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